about a month ago, i started fishing.

fishing for mackerel.

i started by accident really.  it was the sunday afternoon of the labour day long weekend, we went down to new river beach for the afternoon.  hardly a person around because it was forecasted to be bad weather and we went down to the water for a bit.  i acted as ruth’s lifeguard, which in retrospect was a bad choice, because i hate being in the water over my head.  if she got into trouble, she would have been screwed – at the time though, it seemed like a good idea for me to guard while she swam in the bay of fundy.  while ruth was warming up after her swim, i had a nap on the beach leaning against hilary.

it was a nice afternoon.

ed came back to pick us up and brought us down to blacks harbour, he really wanted us to watch him fish.  [ed grew up in fishing communities in newfoundland.]  after he caught a few, he wanted the rest of us to experience the same joy of catching a fish.  it had been quite some time since i last fished – but for the record, i have fished before.  it was fun, we had some laughs and i think ed regretted bringing us down there – we weren’t quite as serious.

i’ve been back at least once, sometimes twice, a week since.

the last few times, the fish haven’t really been biting.  we’ve stood on the wharf for 3-4 hours each visit, just throwing the line, chatting, listening and being still.  my last visit, the borrowed fishing line that i was using broke.  i pretended like i knew how to fix it and put it back together.  still broke.  ed felt bad and wanted to leave because i couldn’t fish.  i wanted to stay.

it is so peaceful and relaxing, standing on some floating wood along the coast of the ocean. fishing and watching others fish.  because the mackerel season is basically over, we weren’t catching much.  we tried a few different places.  it gave me lots of time to think and wonder.  we started catching some harbour pollock, which aren’t very good (i’m told).  it was fun catching them, we were catching 3-5 at a time but releasing them.

it got me to thinking that as followers of Jesus, we are called to be persistent – castling the line, being patient and waiting.  when Jesus called simon, james and john, he met them after a long night of fishing and told them to go back out.  they were reluctant but went back out and fished again.  caught a boat load.  ed and i began talking about how hilarious our situation was and soon realized that its similar in ministry, you can throw the line – offer a program, meal, event, etc… and catch some results.  but it requires patience to catch what you’re hoping for – growth, a willing heart.

i want to go back fishing – i’m not sure by the water or on the streets.

i spent a few days this week, enjoying my break before returning to the office, sitting uptown – doing some reading, drinking coffee and chatting with random people as they came by.

a few times, i was simply watching people as they walked by – some on a break from others, others running errands and some just filling the void.  about 8 of every 10 people that walked by had their faces buried in phone.

are we really that busy?  i was joking with a friend the other night, remembering the first time my parents got a cell phone – it was huge!  i’m not sure that we ever figured out how to use it and the signal was never that good – it was still cool to be able to say that we had a phone in the car.

remember when people would say “hi” to each other as they passed on the sidewalks?  now, we text/email/facebook/tweet.  those are great and i use them too and i’ve been part of the crowd with my face buried.  i feel rebellion stirring within me.  why should everyone have constant contact and access to me – 24/7.

i want to look around while i’m walking and say hi.  i want to see the world and not just read about it through someone’s status update.  i want to hear how people are doing, in more than 140 characters.

can we find the balance?  i want to try.  you might call, email, text or message and have to wait for a reply – i might be reconnecting.  i’ll get back to you, maybe we can meet face-to-face.

time to sit, reflect and clear my head of thoughts.

about two hours passed, i was scrubbing the floors (the song from cinderella popped in my head) and i noticed the same older woman outside the café area in the lobby of the mall.  i asked hilary what the story was with her.  all she remember from earlier was that she was waiting for a ride.  i cohereced hilary to go check on her.  a few minutes later, hilary comes back and had found out that she was waiting for her daughter to come pick her up, from sussex.  her daughter didn’t have a cell phone, neither did this woman.  as the store was about to be locked down for the night, we got a snack and a tea for her.  i went out to chat with her while the store was being locked up.

she was one of these people that for whatever reason i couldn’t ignore.  between hilary and i, we only 75¢ (sad, i know), we left it with her and my cell number.  i told her to call no matter what time and we’d do what we could to help out.  she said ‘thank you’.  we left, i felt bad leaving, but knew that we couldn’t do much more at that point, as far as she knew her ride was coming but didn’t have any way to contact them.

within about an hour, my cell phone rang, hilary ran to answer it and i started getting ready.  the security guards let her use their cell to phone sussex to see if anything happened.  turned out that they had turned back a few hours earlier.  hilary and i said that we’d get her home, and sent off a few texts asking for prayer.  we went back to pick her up, i realized i didn’t even know her name and yet was preparing to drive to sussex in the midst of a storm.  the snow had stopped and it actually looked fairly decent out.  we hit the highway and i felt confident that we’d be good to go, so long as we took our time.  we had some random chit-chat to get to know each other and then the freezing rain started, almost as if a bucket was being poured onto the road.  we were approaching my boss’ house who had offered to put her up for the night and i knew we couldn’t drive much further.

we arrived, had tea together and i said that i’d be back by 9am to finish the journey.  i laid in bed most of the night, not fully understanding the situation.  all evening i kept hearing in the back of my head “i was naked and you clothed me, hungry and fed me, in need and you helped me” and “what ever you did to the least of these you did unto  me”.  i didn’t sleep much, and was up and out in plenty of time.  we finished the journey to sussex on clean highways.  she directed me to her door.  when i pulled in the driveway, we both said ‘thank you’ to each other and she got out.

that was the end of my journey with bernice.  a very gentle older woman.  i sat in a parking lot for a few minutes, pondering what had just happened. a call a friend on the way back and shared the story.  she suggested it was one of those situations that God puts in our paths.

i have no idea if we’ll ever meet again…

i’ll be taken a leave, of sorts (still doing some of my current work, at a distance), and serving as assistant director at camp medley.  i’ve spend a few weeks over the past two summers as chaplain – amazing to see the lives of so many be transformed by the gospel.

i’ve had a few meetings with the director, elizabeth harding.  so far, everything seems to be falling into place for the summer.  we have a great team, who i am looking forward to serving with, some new names for me and the camp.

i have no doubt that it will be busy and crazy – but i live for those moments.  especially when in the middle of chaos, you hear Father’s voice reminding you that he is in complete control and we just need to trust.  i am often humbled by the awe-some opportunity that people have when they work at the christian summer camp.  throughout the summer, we are given the opportunity each week to model the lifestyle that jesus demonstrated for us, to be an example of christian community (both shining and flawed) all while full of joy and excitement.  i have left the past two summers feeling physically exhausted but re-energized by the transformation of campers after sharing the good news of jesus with them.

i am looking forward with anticipation to serving with a great team and continuing to work with liz (shown at right) in planning for this opportunity.

if you’re in the maritimes, you might know of some kids or teens looking for a great week at camp.  check it out.

i applied to st stephen’s university and will begin, technically in the fall, studying through the modular program.  i say ‘technically’ because i’ve already ordered the text books, and since i have to read 16 books before the first module in october, i’ll need to start now.

hilary is also starting a similar program, focusing on worship leadership.

i’m looking forward to it.

for almost two years, i’ve been working on an equipping conference for the maritimes – essentially to bless, equip and encourage the leaders of the maritime churches (and at the same time, promote our ministry). we were finally able to book tony campolo to come as the keynote speaker, had a great planning team in place, workshop/conversation leaders…the whole works.

then the doors get shut. the joy (read: challenge/frustration) of working for a non-profit christian ministry is that we rely on donations from individuals who share the same passion and commitment we do. as the new calendar started to unfold and the current economic climate began to take notice, our support began to decrease. why? because the people supporting began to be more conservative in their giving.

when the time came where we’d need to start spending the money (room bookings, pr materials, etc…), it became a question of ‘do we invest in a conference and hope that people will come?’ or ‘do make sure that ministry costs can be covered for the next month or two?’. i began talking with some folks around who would be interested in coming…despite their excitement, they couldn’t justify the costs for them to come to such an event (travel, meals, accommodations, registration).

we prayed…and listened…prayed some more…i thought about bartering with God…listened more. every time i phoned or emailed one of the leaders it was like another kick to the gut. the conference is canceled.

i don’t doubt that we made the right decision. and i choose to believe that somehow God will use all the labours to his glory. i choose to believe that…and waiting expectingly.

i caught myself preparing to open a small package of screws and was prepared to put the two i needed in my pocket and walk-out.  after all, i only needed the two and there were no containers of lose nails to purchase from.  how much would two screws put them out?

in the end, i pulled myself from the brink of crossing the shoplifting line and bought a small package for $3.00 – which has way more screws that i need!

another day of walking that thin line between upstanding citizen and amature shoplifter.

she said yes!